by J. Mesa 

Needless to say, a rather disturbing story broke yesterday about the MLB, Roger Clemens (again) and a bottle of “daddy’s little helper.”

The report was concerning a not-as-yet illegal performance enhancing drug that supposedly helps to increase endurance by delivering blood, oxygen and other nutrients to muscles more efficiently. This drug can also help to overcome impotence, and annoying side effect of taking testosterone injections and supplements. This magic pill? None other than the little blue diamond in the rough – Viagra!

That’s right, I couldn’t believe it either.

I can’t even begin to put words on how disturbing and creepy this latest development in the MLB drug/steroids scandal has made me feel. 

The report cited former BALCO head-man Victor Conte as saying that all of his athletes took it (Viagra) and that it helped them on the field. Eww. Roger Clemens reportedly had an entire bottle of the stuff in his locker cleverly disguised in a vitamin bottle. Now this news doesn’t surprise me about Clemens. Seems like every time we turn the sports page there is another allegation of an increasing level of ickyness attributed to the former Cy Young winner. I guess we now know how he got the nickname “The Rocket.”

To say that Vitamin V use as a performance-enhancing drug was rampant conjures up the worst images possible. Just thinking about all these roided-up clowns walking around beefed-up from the waist up while another drug is beefing up an area a little south of the border makes me shudder. Talk about your cup runeth over!

This is absolutely the most absurd development of a drug scandal I have ever heard of. Now the question is where do we draw the line? I mean sure, Viagra isn’t on the banned substances list yet, but what are some other “performance-enhancers” will turn up in MLB clubhouses?

Will the Colorado Rockies start stockpiling cases of Robitussin to keep from coughing-up leads in the late innings? We have all had our suspicions, but could a steady supply of Ex-Lax be the catalyst for Ozzie Guillen and Hank Steinbrenner’s diarrhea of the mouth? Let me guess, MLB pitching coaches are now stocking Summer’s Eve to help starting pitchers regain their “freshness” after the seventh-inning stretch?

Just wrong.

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